I don't get what the big deal is about Johari and Nohari windows. Sure, they let others give their ideas on what kinda person you are, but seriously, how many are there out there who actually don't know what kind of person they are? Not too many IMO.
What else could Johari or Nohari windows be for? Self-satisfication derived from the possibility that someone would place you as 'warm, gentle, sensitive'? Meh.
And what's up with that 6-adjectives only rule. Perhaps for people's opinions of others, but most certainly not just 6 for the person describing his own Johari/Nohari. That's just screwed up. =
All that said, I've decided to have a Johari/Nohari window. So come on, amuse me with those fragile and vain things you call opinions. =)
(Holy crap, this is one of my few posts without a >_> inside. OH NOEZ I JUST PARAD0XX0RZ'D MOISELF NUUUUUUUU)
Monday, February 27, 2006
Sunday, February 26, 2006
Dreams, Star Wars and Jason Chan
I'm getting stressed. I absolutely hate physics as a subject, though I have to admit that Jason Chan = ownage. But even then I'm starting to get disturbed.
Just last night I had another one of those epic dreams again. This time it was just a Star Wars / ACS (I) crossover. I recall a number of sithlords, but I cannot remember whom they were. All I remember was that Jason Chan was wearing a black jacket-like thing (Was there a hood? Can't remember. Hmm.) and holding a red lightsaber and giving this uhh Jason-Chan-eqsue evil maniacal laughter (You actually have to try and put some effort into it before you can picture a maniacal laughter that could possibly come out of Jason Chan's mouth).
Maybe I shouldn't have copied the answers for the Jedi Assignment from Shaun and did it instead. It's starting to haunt me. >_>
----------------------------------------------
Baba yetu, yetu (Yesu) uliye
Mbinguni yetu, yetu (Yesu), amina!
Baba yetu, yetu (Yesu), uliye
Jina lako litukuzwe.
(x2)
Utupe leo chakula chetu
Tunachohitaji utusamehe
Makosa yetu, hey!
Kama nasi tunavyowasamehe
Waliotukosea usitutie
Katika majaribu, lakini
Utuokoe, na yule, milelea milele!
Ufalme wako ufike utakalo
Lifanyike duniani kama mbinguni. (Amina)
Utupe leo chakula chetu
Tunachohitaji utusamehe
Makosa yetu, hey!
Kama nasi tunavyowasamehe
Waliotukosea usitutie
Katika majaribu, lakini
Utuokoe, na yule, simama mwehu
Baba yetu, yetu (Yesu), uliye
Jina lako litukuzwe.
-Baba Yetu (Our Father), Civ IV's opening theme
Just last night I had another one of those epic dreams again. This time it was just a Star Wars / ACS (I) crossover. I recall a number of sithlords, but I cannot remember whom they were. All I remember was that Jason Chan was wearing a black jacket-like thing (Was there a hood? Can't remember. Hmm.) and holding a red lightsaber and giving this uhh Jason-Chan-eqsue evil maniacal laughter (You actually have to try and put some effort into it before you can picture a maniacal laughter that could possibly come out of Jason Chan's mouth).
Maybe I shouldn't have copied the answers for the Jedi Assignment from Shaun and did it instead. It's starting to haunt me. >_>
----------------------------------------------
Baba yetu, yetu (Yesu) uliye
Mbinguni yetu, yetu (Yesu), amina!
Baba yetu, yetu (Yesu), uliye
Jina lako litukuzwe.
(x2)
Utupe leo chakula chetu
Tunachohitaji utusamehe
Makosa yetu, hey!
Kama nasi tunavyowasamehe
Waliotukosea usitutie
Katika majaribu, lakini
Utuokoe, na yule, milelea milele!
Ufalme wako ufike utakalo
Lifanyike duniani kama mbinguni. (Amina)
Utupe leo chakula chetu
Tunachohitaji utusamehe
Makosa yetu, hey!
Kama nasi tunavyowasamehe
Waliotukosea usitutie
Katika majaribu, lakini
Utuokoe, na yule, simama mwehu
Baba yetu, yetu (Yesu), uliye
Jina lako litukuzwe.
-Baba Yetu (Our Father), Civ IV's opening theme
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
Anti-Juzzie blog
Wow, it's been a looooong time since I actually wrote one whole blog against someone (I think once was on the people making fun of JK, and the other was on Mike. Yeah, that was really long ago >_>)
Who is it this time? *Antidrumroll* Juzzie. >_>
I've always had a small issue with the way he argues but not much of anything else. On GEPpers Creepers, he just came off as a really insensitive fella until he asked me why I was 'so against him' until I told him there were others 'against him' as well, and it was his fault to begin with. I thought that was fine and over with, he's just not so aware of the way he says things.
Some others have btw complained to me in regards to him; some saying that he's just damn -_- and some saying that he's overreligious and some saying he's a damn hypocrite. For the most of it I guess I could agree with them. >_>
Then there was the time where he was talking about his being against things like Pokemon and FF, because they were - well, I forgot the exact reason, but either it was satanic or non-christian like (Mind you they're different). So I said that "Well, at least things like Mario and Tetris can't possibly be satanic." he replied with "How'd you know".
I asked him then whether perfect Christianity can be achieved by the complete elimination of fantasy, and if I remember correctly he said something along the lines of "No, it need not". UHH. Someone please point out something less satanic/unchristianlike than Mario and Tetris apart from Pong. Seriously, I'm stumped here.
(I suppose someone could make a case of Narnia here, but then I'm referring to games here. Note: fantasy)
Then there came 2006. I get along with him perfectly fine. He occasionally shouts "Hey, watch your words" when Mong says something like "They don't give a shit" or "Bloody humjis" etc etc etc. Agreeable, Mong's saying it unnecessarily.
He scolds me once for playing around with teh dog in class (Ferdquek's one, not Kev's Doglefox) and tells me "If the leader is like this then how does he expect the others to listen?" o_O I don't recall asking them to stop playing around with teh dog, unless they were throwing it at the projector screen to get the string attached to the screen down (A number of fellas so love to swing it up till it coils around either the screen or the light above, and Samteo and Sengwei so love to throw the dog to try and get it down. Darrell too)
So yeah, he's scolding me for something I'm not against. o_O I could understand if he scolded me for letting this go on in class, but dude he has to pay attention before accusing o_O
Then came today. >_>
Mr. Moghan Das conducts his lesson as per normal during IHS Tutorial, and we start discussing on how the pros and cons of community living apply to Singapore. I can't remember why but I made a comment that Lee Kuan Yew is screwed up. Then Juzzie suddenly snapped back at me with "Don't use such language". I reply to him with "I will say what I want if I can justify my statement." he just gives me that look, and goes back to teh lesson. Me eesh teh pissedz0rz.
I have always been a very insensitive person in the sense that I only tend to say what I feel (and if anyone questions I make my case) disregarding the feelings of the receiving end. But in the end, I can always make a case for my statement (Whether the other person can make a better one is irrelevent, though I will say that IMO that's not too common with a few exceptions. Gid argues well except our arguments reduce to a I-rock-u-suck battle far too quickly for much appreciation. Uhh Mike argues well but he can't do it in real life sadly. HW and JK argue very uhh uniquely. Jarrel Seah argues well if he doesn't divert the topic. Not many others I argue with so commonly >_>)
Juzzie tells me not to use such language yet I can perfectly justify my stand that he is indeed somewhat screwed up. Hello, I am darn entitled to my opinion particularly if I can justify it with my reasons. Unlike Mr. Juzzie who dislikes arguing because "it doesn't progress anywhere" AU CONTRAIRE my friend; an argument goes nowhere if:
1. Neither arguer is smart enough to counterargue the other person's argument thus voiding it, instead spamming his own argument ad nauseum.
2. Either arguer uses teh "ZOMG SUM1 OF HAIYA PAWAA SED SO SO IM RITE UR WRONG LAWL" trend of argument or even worse, bringing legality, sedition, and religion into the argument (Only applies if any of the 3 is irrelevent to the argument)
3. Either arguer completely disregards the other person's argument with teh "UR ARGUMENT SUX UR EVIDENZ SUX U SUX LAWL I R0X" trend of argument.
4. Either arguer cannot justify his arguments yet continuously sticks to his point of view.
Maybe he thinks that inconclusive arguments (Which happen oh-so-often) don't progress. The sadness if that is true. Good inconclusive arguments are ever so enlightening, but that's digressing. The point is that Juzzie doesn't like arguing, but that's not our fault, it's his for being so darn incompetent at it. Knowing what you're arguing about can help, Juz =)
He denies me the word "screwed up" in my argument that LKY is screwed up, yet he can easily say that "Professional gamers are the only people I can think of who don't contribute to society" AND YOU WATCH SOCCER DAMNIT the utter hypocrisy. I prove him wrong (With ease too) and he says "Thanks but I'll stick with my opinion" No wonder arguments with him go nowhere. >_>
I'm sorry, I've done ranting about him for now; he's actually a darn normal fella outside of this very annoying problem of his. Well, can't say I'm better than him XD
Who is it this time? *Antidrumroll* Juzzie. >_>
I've always had a small issue with the way he argues but not much of anything else. On GEPpers Creepers, he just came off as a really insensitive fella until he asked me why I was 'so against him' until I told him there were others 'against him' as well, and it was his fault to begin with. I thought that was fine and over with, he's just not so aware of the way he says things.
Some others have btw complained to me in regards to him; some saying that he's just damn -_- and some saying that he's overreligious and some saying he's a damn hypocrite. For the most of it I guess I could agree with them. >_>
Then there was the time where he was talking about his being against things like Pokemon and FF, because they were - well, I forgot the exact reason, but either it was satanic or non-christian like (Mind you they're different). So I said that "Well, at least things like Mario and Tetris can't possibly be satanic." he replied with "How'd you know".
I asked him then whether perfect Christianity can be achieved by the complete elimination of fantasy, and if I remember correctly he said something along the lines of "No, it need not". UHH. Someone please point out something less satanic/unchristianlike than Mario and Tetris apart from Pong. Seriously, I'm stumped here.
(I suppose someone could make a case of Narnia here, but then I'm referring to games here. Note: fantasy)
Then there came 2006. I get along with him perfectly fine. He occasionally shouts "Hey, watch your words" when Mong says something like "They don't give a shit" or "Bloody humjis" etc etc etc. Agreeable, Mong's saying it unnecessarily.
He scolds me once for playing around with teh dog in class (Ferdquek's one, not Kev's Doglefox) and tells me "If the leader is like this then how does he expect the others to listen?" o_O I don't recall asking them to stop playing around with teh dog, unless they were throwing it at the projector screen to get the string attached to the screen down (A number of fellas so love to swing it up till it coils around either the screen or the light above, and Samteo and Sengwei so love to throw the dog to try and get it down. Darrell too)
So yeah, he's scolding me for something I'm not against. o_O I could understand if he scolded me for letting this go on in class, but dude he has to pay attention before accusing o_O
Then came today. >_>
Mr. Moghan Das conducts his lesson as per normal during IHS Tutorial, and we start discussing on how the pros and cons of community living apply to Singapore. I can't remember why but I made a comment that Lee Kuan Yew is screwed up. Then Juzzie suddenly snapped back at me with "Don't use such language". I reply to him with "I will say what I want if I can justify my statement." he just gives me that look, and goes back to teh lesson. Me eesh teh pissedz0rz.
I have always been a very insensitive person in the sense that I only tend to say what I feel (and if anyone questions I make my case) disregarding the feelings of the receiving end. But in the end, I can always make a case for my statement (Whether the other person can make a better one is irrelevent, though I will say that IMO that's not too common with a few exceptions. Gid argues well except our arguments reduce to a I-rock-u-suck battle far too quickly for much appreciation. Uhh Mike argues well but he can't do it in real life sadly. HW and JK argue very uhh uniquely. Jarrel Seah argues well if he doesn't divert the topic. Not many others I argue with so commonly >_>)
Juzzie tells me not to use such language yet I can perfectly justify my stand that he is indeed somewhat screwed up. Hello, I am darn entitled to my opinion particularly if I can justify it with my reasons. Unlike Mr. Juzzie who dislikes arguing because "it doesn't progress anywhere" AU CONTRAIRE my friend; an argument goes nowhere if:
1. Neither arguer is smart enough to counterargue the other person's argument thus voiding it, instead spamming his own argument ad nauseum.
2. Either arguer uses teh "ZOMG SUM1 OF HAIYA PAWAA SED SO SO IM RITE UR WRONG LAWL" trend of argument or even worse, bringing legality, sedition, and religion into the argument (Only applies if any of the 3 is irrelevent to the argument)
3. Either arguer completely disregards the other person's argument with teh "UR ARGUMENT SUX UR EVIDENZ SUX U SUX LAWL I R0X" trend of argument.
4. Either arguer cannot justify his arguments yet continuously sticks to his point of view.
Maybe he thinks that inconclusive arguments (Which happen oh-so-often) don't progress. The sadness if that is true. Good inconclusive arguments are ever so enlightening, but that's digressing. The point is that Juzzie doesn't like arguing, but that's not our fault, it's his for being so darn incompetent at it. Knowing what you're arguing about can help, Juz =)
He denies me the word "screwed up" in my argument that LKY is screwed up, yet he can easily say that "Professional gamers are the only people I can think of who don't contribute to society" AND YOU WATCH SOCCER DAMNIT the utter hypocrisy. I prove him wrong (With ease too) and he says "Thanks but I'll stick with my opinion" No wonder arguments with him go nowhere. >_>
I'm sorry, I've done ranting about him for now; he's actually a darn normal fella outside of this very annoying problem of his. Well, can't say I'm better than him XD
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Chatlogs, img macro version
>_> It's been rather amusing showing macros to people and getting results from them.
Picture 1
Typical replies:
"V-Day is D-D: o_O"
"My baby sist: LOL XD
wtf is that XD"
And not-so-typical replies:
You'll be in: What insightful picture have you got for me today. >_>
Potato: You're supposed to go wth >_>
You'll be in: OH, RIGHT... >_>
WTH...
hahaha LeamZ: eh? Oh man.
Potato: >_> i'm bored
hahaha LeamZ: I love you. This could prove to be of ultimate use to me. (No, nothing weird, just some random forum invasion)
(This is KW, btw) ???, ??????,: (hi)
???, ??????,: I don't understand the picture. > . >
And the downright disturbing.
Chaos is a u: oh...this is nothing
(Proceeds to send me a picture of Yvonne Lim wearing a Girl Scout's uniform. I then send it to Cleon.)
hahaha LeamZ: JESUS ****ING CHRIST.
HOLY SWEET ME ON A BICYCLE.
MY EYES
THE GOGGLES
ZE DO NOTHING
Potato: See, JX hash owned me >_>
hahaha LeamZ: My fantasy of kidnapping and raping loli girlscouts that come to my doorstep has been smashed.
HPGW<3 }} : O_O WTH LOL
sounds like pck -.-
Potato: WTH
HPGW<3 }} : a mecks. butt secks
Picture 2
Typical replies:
Arthas the P: LOL XD
OMG
WHERE DO YOU KEEP GETTING THESE STUFF FROM XD
Lost-and-fou: o_O
You'll be in my heart [ S T R I P E S T H E T I G E R ] says:
UH... That's mean. >_<
No uncommon ones, only disturbing ones
HPGW<3 }} : o_o how disturbing
Potato: I hope this isn't like PCK
HPGW<3 }} : huh what has she got to do with that o_O
Potato: Remember the other image
teh buttseckz one
HPGW<3 }} : oh, oh, righto
i thought you meant you're hoping she won't suddenly go "You gonna get raped" to us one day o_O
Potato: O_O
And teh best:
KW: (hi!)
Me: >_______________>
Nothing else to say o_O?
KW: Err, disturbing.
Me: >____________________________________________>
Damn you and your lack of extremism
KW: The cat is so cute!
KW: -_-
Me: AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
KW: The pic just gives me those kinda... 'Urgh it's another one of these pics' feelings.
Me: It IS another one of those pics >_>
KW: Exactly.
KW: Not like I've not seen these kinda' pics before, so.
KW: And besides I thought the cat was cute!
KW: And today my brother found a kitten in a drain!
KW: It was really cute!
KW: Then my bro and my neighbour resued it from the drain and played with it a bit.
KW: So I went down to see it too; it was white with brown patches!
KW: I think that's the best colour combo for a cat. XD
KW: So anyway, we gave it a string and a ball and a shoebox for it to play with. (happy)
KW: It was really adorable; rolling about with the string and ball! (yes!)
KW: And cuddling inside the shoebox!
KW: Then it overturned it and was moving around with it over it's head! XD
KW: Kawaii-desu~!
KW: And we named it Patches. =D
KW: But no, we didn't get to keep it. x_x
Me: ...I'm not going to sleep well tonight.
KW: -_-
Me: >_______________>
KW: -_-
Me: Nothing else about patches?
KW: Why, gonna; copy it out to the whole
World? -_-
Me: Kinda
There are gems in life
Some were meant to be shared
KW: Haha, yeah that's true, the cuteness of Patches must be shared~! XD
Me: ...I lose >_>
KW: You lose what?
Me: Nevermind
KW: -_-
---------------------------------------------
I need more awesome pictures >_> Admittedly though, now we all can see why stereotyping continues, after all, it is justified. >_>
Picture 1
Typical replies:
"V-Day is D-D: o_O"
"My baby sist: LOL XD
wtf is that XD"
And not-so-typical replies:
You'll be in: What insightful picture have you got for me today. >_>
Potato: You're supposed to go wth >_>
You'll be in: OH, RIGHT... >_>
WTH...
hahaha LeamZ: eh? Oh man.
Potato: >_> i'm bored
hahaha LeamZ: I love you. This could prove to be of ultimate use to me. (No, nothing weird, just some random forum invasion)
(This is KW, btw) ???, ??????,: (hi)
???, ??????,: I don't understand the picture. > . >
And the downright disturbing.
Chaos is a u: oh...this is nothing
(Proceeds to send me a picture of Yvonne Lim wearing a Girl Scout's uniform. I then send it to Cleon.)
hahaha LeamZ: JESUS ****ING CHRIST.
HOLY SWEET ME ON A BICYCLE.
MY EYES
THE GOGGLES
ZE DO NOTHING
Potato: See, JX hash owned me >_>
hahaha LeamZ: My fantasy of kidnapping and raping loli girlscouts that come to my doorstep has been smashed.
HPGW<3 }} : O_O WTH LOL
sounds like pck -.-
Potato: WTH
HPGW<3 }} : a mecks. butt secks
Picture 2
Typical replies:
Arthas the P: LOL XD
OMG
WHERE DO YOU KEEP GETTING THESE STUFF FROM XD
Lost-and-fou: o_O
You'll be in my heart [ S T R I P E S T H E T I G E R ] says:
UH... That's mean. >_<
No uncommon ones, only disturbing ones
HPGW<3 }} : o_o how disturbing
Potato: I hope this isn't like PCK
HPGW<3 }} : huh what has she got to do with that o_O
Potato: Remember the other image
teh buttseckz one
HPGW<3 }} : oh, oh, righto
i thought you meant you're hoping she won't suddenly go "You gonna get raped" to us one day o_O
Potato: O_O
And teh best:
KW: (hi!)
Me: >_______________>
Nothing else to say o_O?
KW: Err, disturbing.
Me: >____________________________________________>
Damn you and your lack of extremism
KW: The cat is so cute!
KW: -_-
Me: AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
KW: The pic just gives me those kinda... 'Urgh it's another one of these pics' feelings.
Me: It IS another one of those pics >_>
KW: Exactly.
KW: Not like I've not seen these kinda' pics before, so.
KW: And besides I thought the cat was cute!
KW: And today my brother found a kitten in a drain!
KW: It was really cute!
KW: Then my bro and my neighbour resued it from the drain and played with it a bit.
KW: So I went down to see it too; it was white with brown patches!
KW: I think that's the best colour combo for a cat. XD
KW: So anyway, we gave it a string and a ball and a shoebox for it to play with. (happy)
KW: It was really adorable; rolling about with the string and ball! (yes!)
KW: And cuddling inside the shoebox!
KW: Then it overturned it and was moving around with it over it's head! XD
KW: Kawaii-desu~!
KW: And we named it Patches. =D
KW: But no, we didn't get to keep it. x_x
Me: ...I'm not going to sleep well tonight.
KW: -_-
Me: >_______________>
KW: -_-
Me: Nothing else about patches?
KW: Why, gonna; copy it out to the whole
World? -_-
Me: Kinda
There are gems in life
Some were meant to be shared
KW: Haha, yeah that's true, the cuteness of Patches must be shared~! XD
Me: ...I lose >_>
KW: You lose what?
Me: Nevermind
KW: -_-
---------------------------------------------
I need more awesome pictures >_> Admittedly though, now we all can see why stereotyping continues, after all, it is justified. >_>
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Serenity
Air TV ED: Farewell Song
白く途切れた夢の切れ端をつかまえて 少年は走る
手を放したらどこまでも遠く風の音に消えてゆく
ひとつだけの思いを飛ばして
まぶたの裏に描きはじめた絵は霞んで 手のひらでこすっても
いつか見えた優しさはもうない
ひとり踏み出す足だけ見てる
朝には消えたあの歌声をいつまでも聞いてた
野道の先で赤く生るほうずきせがんで 子供がはしゃいでる
いつか知った優しさの中にも
同じ風景 あるならいいね
朝には消えたあの歌声をいつまでも聞いてた
僕らが残したあの足跡をいつまでも追ってた
朝には消えたあの歌声をいつまでもいつまでも
僕らが残したあの足跡をどこまでも追ってた
そう終わりは別れとあるものだから すべて置いてゆく
朝には日差しの中 新しい歌、口ずさんでる
-----------------------------------
Translation:
A young boy catches a fragment of a dream interrupted and away he runs
If he lets go, it will vanish to the strains of a distant wind
One single memory floating away
The scene half-drawn behind my eyelids is fading
Even when I rub them with my palm
The tenderness I once glimpsed is no longer there
I look only at the foot falling in front of me
I'd been forever listening to the singing of a voice that vanished in the morning.
Ahead on the path through the field, a child is frolicking snatching at the red Hoozuki plants
In the midst of the gentleness I once knew, I hope the scenery remains the same
I'd been forever listening to the singing of a voice that vanished in the morning
Forever chasing after the foot prints we left behind
Such an ending is the stuff of farewells, and so I leave everything behind
In the sunlight of morning, I sing a new song to myself
-----------------------------------------------
These days I'm just feeling oversentimental again, thanks to certain people. Curse yee all >_>
-----------------------------------------------
Naughty has disappeared, coming and acquainting himself with the family, and just suddenly disappearing. I wonder where he is right now; given him he's probably going where no cat has gone before (Which probably consists of a lot of places, given how timid cats are *Him being an obvious exception, haha*), or being the centre of attention among more fellas, haha.
...I wonder if I'll be so lighthearted when a friend disappears. Well, I'll find out in a few year's time, haha. >_>
I've had a liking for things like the wind; that which comes and goes; none knowing its destination but all knowing their meeting in its journey. One can only bear true value of another when s/he can be lost; and one can only realize this when s/he does. Up till now, I've made many regrets in regards to people I've known:
Jonathan, Feng Yi, Ke Xin, Shamus, Stephen, and more. Jonathan was the very first friend I had, and we were good friends up till P1, when he moved house to Signature Park. 8 years past, and I still remember his phone number; 4684559 ('course now we need the 6 in front too. Memories of when we didn't, huh.) Back then, we played many various games, and loved to see the sheep demo (That's what we called it) on his Macintosh (Or was it something else? I never asked him what his com's OS was, primarily because I didn't know what an OS was >_>). I still remember how those sheep would bounce about randomly, walk around aimlessly, and eventually go off the screen just to return at the press of a button.
I still remember pushing him into the Pei Hwa pond by accident (I still don't know whether I pushed him unintentionally, or he fell in. I apologized in the end anyway, so little does this matter now), and how we said we weren't going to friend each other anymore, but then it ended up I apologized a few days after, haha. >_>
I still remember the first friend I made in P1: Angelica, she was such the sweet girl; she even remembered me in P3 after not seeing her one bit in P2.
I remember my teachers; Yu Lao Shi for Chinese and I believe CME (Otherwise known then as Hao Gong Ming ^_^), Ms. Low (She married during P2) for English and Math. I can hardly remember any other teacher; mainly because the timetable for P1 is amazingly slack. I slacked most the year and still got 96 Eng, 100 Math, and 90-something Chinese (I believe). I got 2nd in class, and 10th in level, somehow. XD
But back then, I never realized that this kind of experience would never exist again in my life, eh.
When I was P2, I remember fighting alongside Gid and YM against Caleb and Jireh (Speaking of which, they're JC1 this year, aren't they? Hmm, I wonder how they're doing.), remembering Gid crying, remembering YM crying, but never myself crying; I only remember them being worried about me. I remember Gid eating the Sausage in my Hotcakes with Sausage (It was my first time eating that too; prior to that I thought Hotcakes were sold with nothing else) because a number of us did well in a Math test, he wasn't XD
I remember how everyday in P2 till I left Pei Hwa, I would go to recess just to see Yu Min being kicked by 3 random girls in my class; and how he would call to me for help, and how I would actually join in kicking him at times. >_> All that said, in P4-6 he was seriously a smart fella that I certainly looked up to. Gid I treated with less respect and was more friendly towards because he was mostly joking around in P4, and I wasn't with him P5/6. I didn't really get along much with Jarrel in P4-6, interestingly.
In P3, we would have that simple but fun game during recess: two lines of people, each at one end of a stone path. One person from each side runs up, and when they clash, they play Scissors-Paper-Stone, and the loser moves aside for the winner to continue running and clash with the next person, up till someone has managed to go to the other side (It could go on for rather long, honestly.) I originally didn't really play that, instead I was playing catching with people like Ching To (He was such teh nice yet cool fella), Edmund, and usually we would make fun of Jing Hua as well. >_>
"Rain alert! Rain alert! Get back!" - Jing Hua, 2000. >_> Oh, the amusement.
I remember being ever so grateful to Feng Yi, because after all, she was really a great person. How she didn't end up as head prefect and only vice-head prefect was something that confused me. Another one was how she didn't get into GEP. Had she, I probably would be in Chinese High right now, haha. *sigh* wonder where she is now, heh.
Honestly, I wouldn't value these people as much as I do now had I not lost them. But now, what can I do? I can only remember the Jonathan of 8 years ago, the Feng Yi of 6, the Ke Xin of 4, and that was the most obvious thing that happened with Melissa; I only remembered the Melissa from 2 years ago.
Even though I have the phone number for Jonathan, I fear picking it up and calling him, to reach a wrong number, or even worse, to have someone who cannot remember me reply.
"To be forgotten is worse than death." Freya, FFIX
And what of those I search for but cannot find? Those which I will no longer be able to see, greet, and reminiscize about old days? I regret not the actions I take; but the actions I was unable to take. I've never managed to thank Feng Yi or Ke Xin for being so nice to me, and when I go back to Pei Hwa, they are no longer there, and neither is the Pei Hwa I used to know. And in the end, when all is done and finished, I have but memories but nothing else, myself and no one else, and even if the rest are gone, I am still there with nothing but memories of them being there with me.
Here's one for you (You know who you are =) : Who's got it worse; one who has everything but memories, or one who has nothing but memories? One who always changes to others and loses himself, or one who adamantly remains the same, staying true to himself but never to others? One who loses none but himself, or one who loses all but himself?
Human lives are such like the wind, it comes, and you feel the gentle breeze and lay in comfort, but soon and sudden is it gone and you look far out, never to see it again.
A breeze can only be appreciated when it is not constant like the artificial fan, by which you grow used to and willingly stop on your own. It is because the wind is so sudden, so swift, so hard to get, yet so gentle nonetheless, that it is so beautiful.
I may not be sad at their disappearance, but I will definitely remember the times of those who have touched my life, for it is what I can do in place of the tears I cannot cry. Each life is beautiful, but one only appreciates the wind when it is gone, not when it is blowing.
And even when my wings are broken; I shall keep them eternally, for they still bear the meaning and the memories of when it could, because of the others I could step on so I could get high enough to fly who have helped me along and lightened the load I bore.
"朝には消えたあの歌声をいつまでもいつまでも
僕らが残したあの足跡をどこまでも追ってた
そう終わりは別れとあるものだから すべて置いてゆく
朝には日差しの中 新しい歌、口ずさんでる"
白く途切れた夢の切れ端をつかまえて 少年は走る
手を放したらどこまでも遠く風の音に消えてゆく
ひとつだけの思いを飛ばして
まぶたの裏に描きはじめた絵は霞んで 手のひらでこすっても
いつか見えた優しさはもうない
ひとり踏み出す足だけ見てる
朝には消えたあの歌声をいつまでも聞いてた
野道の先で赤く生るほうずきせがんで 子供がはしゃいでる
いつか知った優しさの中にも
同じ風景 あるならいいね
朝には消えたあの歌声をいつまでも聞いてた
僕らが残したあの足跡をいつまでも追ってた
朝には消えたあの歌声をいつまでもいつまでも
僕らが残したあの足跡をどこまでも追ってた
そう終わりは別れとあるものだから すべて置いてゆく
朝には日差しの中 新しい歌、口ずさんでる
-----------------------------------
Translation:
A young boy catches a fragment of a dream interrupted and away he runs
If he lets go, it will vanish to the strains of a distant wind
One single memory floating away
The scene half-drawn behind my eyelids is fading
Even when I rub them with my palm
The tenderness I once glimpsed is no longer there
I look only at the foot falling in front of me
I'd been forever listening to the singing of a voice that vanished in the morning.
Ahead on the path through the field, a child is frolicking snatching at the red Hoozuki plants
In the midst of the gentleness I once knew, I hope the scenery remains the same
I'd been forever listening to the singing of a voice that vanished in the morning
Forever chasing after the foot prints we left behind
Such an ending is the stuff of farewells, and so I leave everything behind
In the sunlight of morning, I sing a new song to myself
-----------------------------------------------
These days I'm just feeling oversentimental again, thanks to certain people. Curse yee all >_>
-----------------------------------------------
Naughty has disappeared, coming and acquainting himself with the family, and just suddenly disappearing. I wonder where he is right now; given him he's probably going where no cat has gone before (Which probably consists of a lot of places, given how timid cats are *Him being an obvious exception, haha*), or being the centre of attention among more fellas, haha.
...I wonder if I'll be so lighthearted when a friend disappears. Well, I'll find out in a few year's time, haha. >_>
I've had a liking for things like the wind; that which comes and goes; none knowing its destination but all knowing their meeting in its journey. One can only bear true value of another when s/he can be lost; and one can only realize this when s/he does. Up till now, I've made many regrets in regards to people I've known:
Jonathan, Feng Yi, Ke Xin, Shamus, Stephen, and more. Jonathan was the very first friend I had, and we were good friends up till P1, when he moved house to Signature Park. 8 years past, and I still remember his phone number; 4684559 ('course now we need the 6 in front too. Memories of when we didn't, huh.) Back then, we played many various games, and loved to see the sheep demo (That's what we called it) on his Macintosh (Or was it something else? I never asked him what his com's OS was, primarily because I didn't know what an OS was >_>). I still remember how those sheep would bounce about randomly, walk around aimlessly, and eventually go off the screen just to return at the press of a button.
I still remember pushing him into the Pei Hwa pond by accident (I still don't know whether I pushed him unintentionally, or he fell in. I apologized in the end anyway, so little does this matter now), and how we said we weren't going to friend each other anymore, but then it ended up I apologized a few days after, haha. >_>
I still remember the first friend I made in P1: Angelica, she was such the sweet girl; she even remembered me in P3 after not seeing her one bit in P2.
I remember my teachers; Yu Lao Shi for Chinese and I believe CME (Otherwise known then as Hao Gong Ming ^_^), Ms. Low (She married during P2) for English and Math. I can hardly remember any other teacher; mainly because the timetable for P1 is amazingly slack. I slacked most the year and still got 96 Eng, 100 Math, and 90-something Chinese (I believe). I got 2nd in class, and 10th in level, somehow. XD
But back then, I never realized that this kind of experience would never exist again in my life, eh.
When I was P2, I remember fighting alongside Gid and YM against Caleb and Jireh (Speaking of which, they're JC1 this year, aren't they? Hmm, I wonder how they're doing.), remembering Gid crying, remembering YM crying, but never myself crying; I only remember them being worried about me. I remember Gid eating the Sausage in my Hotcakes with Sausage (It was my first time eating that too; prior to that I thought Hotcakes were sold with nothing else) because a number of us did well in a Math test, he wasn't XD
I remember how everyday in P2 till I left Pei Hwa, I would go to recess just to see Yu Min being kicked by 3 random girls in my class; and how he would call to me for help, and how I would actually join in kicking him at times. >_> All that said, in P4-6 he was seriously a smart fella that I certainly looked up to. Gid I treated with less respect and was more friendly towards because he was mostly joking around in P4, and I wasn't with him P5/6. I didn't really get along much with Jarrel in P4-6, interestingly.
In P3, we would have that simple but fun game during recess: two lines of people, each at one end of a stone path. One person from each side runs up, and when they clash, they play Scissors-Paper-Stone, and the loser moves aside for the winner to continue running and clash with the next person, up till someone has managed to go to the other side (It could go on for rather long, honestly.) I originally didn't really play that, instead I was playing catching with people like Ching To (He was such teh nice yet cool fella), Edmund, and usually we would make fun of Jing Hua as well. >_>
"Rain alert! Rain alert! Get back!" - Jing Hua, 2000. >_> Oh, the amusement.
I remember being ever so grateful to Feng Yi, because after all, she was really a great person. How she didn't end up as head prefect and only vice-head prefect was something that confused me. Another one was how she didn't get into GEP. Had she, I probably would be in Chinese High right now, haha. *sigh* wonder where she is now, heh.
Honestly, I wouldn't value these people as much as I do now had I not lost them. But now, what can I do? I can only remember the Jonathan of 8 years ago, the Feng Yi of 6, the Ke Xin of 4, and that was the most obvious thing that happened with Melissa; I only remembered the Melissa from 2 years ago.
Even though I have the phone number for Jonathan, I fear picking it up and calling him, to reach a wrong number, or even worse, to have someone who cannot remember me reply.
"To be forgotten is worse than death." Freya, FFIX
And what of those I search for but cannot find? Those which I will no longer be able to see, greet, and reminiscize about old days? I regret not the actions I take; but the actions I was unable to take. I've never managed to thank Feng Yi or Ke Xin for being so nice to me, and when I go back to Pei Hwa, they are no longer there, and neither is the Pei Hwa I used to know. And in the end, when all is done and finished, I have but memories but nothing else, myself and no one else, and even if the rest are gone, I am still there with nothing but memories of them being there with me.
Here's one for you (You know who you are =) : Who's got it worse; one who has everything but memories, or one who has nothing but memories? One who always changes to others and loses himself, or one who adamantly remains the same, staying true to himself but never to others? One who loses none but himself, or one who loses all but himself?
Human lives are such like the wind, it comes, and you feel the gentle breeze and lay in comfort, but soon and sudden is it gone and you look far out, never to see it again.
A breeze can only be appreciated when it is not constant like the artificial fan, by which you grow used to and willingly stop on your own. It is because the wind is so sudden, so swift, so hard to get, yet so gentle nonetheless, that it is so beautiful.
I may not be sad at their disappearance, but I will definitely remember the times of those who have touched my life, for it is what I can do in place of the tears I cannot cry. Each life is beautiful, but one only appreciates the wind when it is gone, not when it is blowing.
And even when my wings are broken; I shall keep them eternally, for they still bear the meaning and the memories of when it could, because of the others
"朝には消えたあの歌声をいつまでもいつまでも
僕らが残したあの足跡をどこまでも追ってた
そう終わりは別れとあるものだから すべて置いてゆく
朝には日差しの中 新しい歌、口ずさんでる"
Sunday, February 05, 2006
Naughty teh Catz0rz
As attempts to call the cat Mao have failed, subsequent references to teh 3rd cat shall be known by "Naughty". And I'm serious here.
Naughty is seriously amazing. He's managed to do things I deemed incomprehensible as far as the feline world is concerned. He has:
Managed to jump up onto me (While reading the newspapers) and fall asleep.
Get its tail stepped on without any visible reaction.
Continue to fall asleep while I move its legs and arms around (Seriously, Kitty and Neko would wake up and bite me before I touch her/him)
DESTROY an entire loaf of bread while my mom was washing her face (She takes out bread, puts it on table, goes to wash her face, comes out, the bread was DESTROYED and approximately 5m away >_>)
Chase its own shadow
Bite its own tail until it realized that it was his own tail, then start licking it
Chase the shadows of Kitty and Neko, thinking that it's not going to piss em off (It's highly amusing how the newcomer is bullying the old-timers. >_>)
Slip and fall off the computer table a number of times
Kill half the plants my mom was growing, and DESTROY a number of pots as well, then play around with the soil that gets dumped on the floor
Try to play with wires (Dad managed to stop it)
Walk onto the newspaper and lie down while I was reading it (I read it on the floor)
Show no visible response when I quickpull teh newspaper below. Continues to lie down like the slacker he is. >_>
He's managed to do some rather catastrophic stuff thus far, seriously. I once thought that "curiosity killed the cat" wasn't very accurate; guess I take that back. >_> He's a walking disaster damnit. And to think that Mom took it in from Gid the first day thinking "Aw, poor widdl thing". Ooh, the irony. >_<
Well, not much to blog about; I've got a hell lotta work to do for all the procrastination I've managed so far. >_> Don't expect blogging too often therefore. Ja. >_>
Naughty is seriously amazing. He's managed to do things I deemed incomprehensible as far as the feline world is concerned. He has:
Managed to jump up onto me (While reading the newspapers) and fall asleep.
Get its tail stepped on without any visible reaction.
Continue to fall asleep while I move its legs and arms around (Seriously, Kitty and Neko would wake up and bite me before I touch her/him)
DESTROY an entire loaf of bread while my mom was washing her face (She takes out bread, puts it on table, goes to wash her face, comes out, the bread was DESTROYED and approximately 5m away >_>)
Chase its own shadow
Bite its own tail until it realized that it was his own tail, then start licking it
Chase the shadows of Kitty and Neko, thinking that it's not going to piss em off (It's highly amusing how the newcomer is bullying the old-timers. >_>)
Slip and fall off the computer table a number of times
Kill half the plants my mom was growing, and DESTROY a number of pots as well, then play around with the soil that gets dumped on the floor
Try to play with wires (Dad managed to stop it)
Walk onto the newspaper and lie down while I was reading it (I read it on the floor)
Show no visible response when I quickpull teh newspaper below. Continues to lie down like the slacker he is. >_>
He's managed to do some rather catastrophic stuff thus far, seriously. I once thought that "curiosity killed the cat" wasn't very accurate; guess I take that back. >_> He's a walking disaster damnit. And to think that Mom took it in from Gid the first day thinking "Aw, poor widdl thing". Ooh, the irony. >_<
Well, not much to blog about; I've got a hell lotta work to do for all the procrastination I've managed so far. >_> Don't expect blogging too often therefore. Ja. >_>
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