Destiny

I feel rather down for some reason. I suppose it was talking with Wensi about the fate of the GEP student. I don't know, whatever I said in that conversation was completely true, and nothing contraband, but I'm lazy so I won't bother putting it up here.

I for one take 10 subjects. I know Zhang and Mike take 10 too. Eng, Lit, Chi, Math, Psc, Lsc, Geog, Hist, Art, Jap. See? 10.

Next year? It's even worse! =)

Eng and Lit form Language Arts.
Chi.
C-Math (It's the norm)
Physics and Chemistry instead of Bio
Geog stays
Hist goes
Art goes
Jap stays
Philosophy of Discipline joins
Computer Studies joins
That's 9 now, but they're all higher level. *sigh*

And if I wanna become Staff Sergeant for SJAB (I've given up SoH >_>) that means I can't take OM next year or I'll waste too much time on it. Btw, Sergeant Fate, if I join FAC when I'm S3 that means I can't be ASM or CSM, right (Since FAC is a requirement for ASM/CSM)? Aah, CSM goes to John Ang naturally. What I'm not fine with is Ezra becoming ASM, because >_>

Then there's the UYO. That definitely takes time and commitment, any way you look at it. Band? Yes. NCC? Yes. NPCC? Yes. NCDCC? Yes. Military Bagpipe Band? No >_> BB? Yes. Scouts? Yes. SJAB? Obviously yes because it's not a Military Bagpipe Band >_>

Then there's other CCA commitments to meet up to. Isaac has Rugby. That's darn tough. Josh is in Soccer. So's Hen. Just as tough. Jun Yi's in Cross-Country. Lots of training. Gid's in Water Polo. That's alot of training too. Me? I'm in Library >_>

Then there's competitions. I've OM. That takes up time. Lots of it. Just as much as UYO. Obviously more fun than UYO, but it takes up time. PRECIOUS TIME!!!! Nevermind >_>

Then there's the thing that only GEPs get: Discrimination. We're GEPs, we're stereotyped, we're hated, we're disliked, we're nerdy to their eyes, we're studious losers, we're pathetic at everything apart from studies to them, we're really discriminated. T_T

Ok, that was somewhat exaggerated. But you get the point. The mainstream teachers don't help the situation any, since they're on the mainstream side. The GEP teachers don't help either, since we're GEPs and this is part of the deal. Low school fees, enriched learning for utter discrimination. Nice deal, eh. =
The GEP is the envy of students because they're all geniuses, and the Normal Technical is the laughingstock of all students for the exact opposite reasons. It is instead the middle which receives the least amount of stress. The GEP have expectations to make and discrimination to deal with. Normal Technical has exactly the same thing. We're no different in reality. Sad truth, huh.

If we want to destroy the stereotype of GEPpers, it's impossible. Stereotypes aren't destroyed, they're subverted. And more subverted. And ignored.

What do we do to deal against the discrimination? We make fun of the mainstream. We leech off their weaknesses. We make parodies and we sing them. Kev made a really nice Anti-ACSI parody to the tune of Under the Sea. *We don't focus on the mainstream, we focus on the evil that is Dr. Ong and 118.* Why? Because we can. Because we know we're capable of such stuff. Because.

There's another way to take. Denial.

"A name indicates the existence of a thing. If, in fact, that name is false... If that is false, then it would mean that the very existence of that thing is false, wouldn't it?" Gilbert Durandal (I prefer Durandal to Dullindal. G-SEED Destiny. All quotes today are from G-SEED/Destiny, btw.)

This was the path Jeremy Teo took. He's happy since he picked the perfect time to change to the mainstream (Primary School-Secondary School Transition). And I will admit he would have had problems if he decided to stay in.

We can't take this path. We aren't false people. We've gone too far to just turn back and say "I'm not a GEP". That's shirking responsibility. That's denying your potential. That's saying you aren't who you are today. That's betrayal of not just your friends, but also yourself. Seriously, can we choose this now? If only.

"Power is necessary because conflict will never dissappear."
Gilbert Durandal

Indeed, it is. But to what extent do we show the existence of our power? Until the enemy surrenders? Until one side is gone? And because of that you exercise your strength?

"This war won't end, even if you fight."
Kira Yamato

If we ever participate in anything, people discriminate us. If we hate them, that gives them more reason to hate us. Such a simple chain reaction, and yet how effecient it is.

"You can't do everything just because you have the heart and power to do it."
Lacus Clyne

This is beyond our power. The GEP can't just prove to the world they aren't the geniuses people think they are. We can't pretend it was all a lie. We can't force it into them. What way is there? Only one.

"The hardest battle is to keep on living."
Cagalli Yula Attha

*sigh* Not the hardest, the endless. And so we live on, smart but powerless.

.....Sorry for that, it sounded rather angsty.

---------------------------------------------------

Chorus of "Destiny", by Nami Tamaki

いつか見てた遠いあの空は
キミの心につながっていた
目を閉じればいつも名前呼ぶ声だけ聴こえる

Rough translation (I can't find one on the net)

Whever I stare away at the faraway sky,
My heart bonds with yours,
And when I close my eyes I can hear your voice calling out to me.

Bridge:

誰かを想うほど強くなる
自分を見つける 満たされてく
目を閉じればキミが名前呼ぶ声だけ聴こえる

If anyone ever thinks of becoming strong,
Look at yourself and (???)
And when I close my eyes I can hear your voice calling out to me.

--------------------------

Destiny - Nami Tamaki

いつか見てた遠いあの空は
キミの心につながっていた
目を閉じればいつも名前呼ぶ声だけ聴こえる

遠い瞳の向こう キミは何を映すだろう
深く息を吸えば風の色も変わった

自分を信じているのに
胸がつぶれそうな不安や迷い
あるのはキミだけじゃないから. . .

変わらないこたえがあればいい
哀しいくらい時間(とき)に流され
だから永遠とか僕らは探したがるんだ

いつか見てた遠いあの空は
キミの心につながっていた
目を閉じればいつも名前呼ぶ声だけ聴こえる

何も言わなくても気持ち伝える瞬間(とき)があるね
ささいなことにさえ感じるヨロコビがある

不器用な僕らはいつも
少し遠回りしているよね
すべてが欲しいわけじゃないけど. . .

満たされたい想い抱えては
埋めることだけ考えてたね
与えたならきっと癒される自分もいるんだ

いつか見てた遠いあの空は
キミの心につながっていた
目を閉じればいつも名前呼ぶ声だけ聴こえる

誰かを想うほど強くなる
自分を見つける 満たされてく
目を閉じればキミが名前呼ぶ声だけ聴こえる

変わらないこたえがあればいい
哀しいくらい時間(とき)に流され
だから永遠とか僕らは探したがるんだ

いつか見てた遠いあの空は
キミの心につながっていた
目を閉じればいつも名前呼ぶ声だけ聴こえる